Impacted Earwax

Free UK delivery on orders over £50 - Delivery and returns information

All profits go to the Ministry of Stories, a creative writing charity for humans

Notes for Humans:

Delicious Clotted Cream Fudge (50g).

Ingredients

Sugar, Glucose syrup, Sweetened condensed milk, Refined vegetable oil, Clotted cream 4%, Butter, Emulsifier: soya lecithin, Humectant: glycerine, Salt.

‘Absolutely delicious. Sticks to your ribs.’

-Richard C, Troll

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Delivery information

We currently deliver to UK destinations only, via 1st class Royal Mail. We will update this page as new shipping destinations around the world (and underworld) become available.

In the meanwhile many of our products are available with international delivery from Liberty and Firebox.

Postage and packing costs:

- £3.50 for orders of up to £25,

- £7 for orders £25 - £50

- Free for any order over £50.

This charge helps cover our costs and ensures your purchases support writing workshops for young people at the Ministry of Stories.

Our team of zombie volunteers fulfils orders once a week and on average you can expect delivery within 12 working days of order confirmation, and usually sooner. Unless something truly hideous happens, in which case delays of several centuries are not unlikely.

Returns information

You can return products if:

- You decide within seven days the product isn’t for you. You’ll receive a full refund, including delivery charge, processed within 30 days of return of the unwanted goods. Please send this with the original returns form supplied with your order, emailing us at info@monstersupplies.org to let us know it is on the way. Please look after the product when you have it! Do not burn it, eat it, sit on it, drown it, or in any way cause it harm. We might need to ask for compensation otherwise.

- You don’t agree to a change in our terms and conditions or other policies, or you think the product is faulty. You will need to return the product with its original returns form. We’ll check the product upon receipt and email you regarding your refund. We’ll process it as soon as monstrously possible – definitely within 30 days of us emailing to confirm a refund. You’ll receive the full price of the product and delivery, plus any costs for sending it to us.

Please check the dispatch confirmation to find out more about your statutory right of cancellation. Returning a product doesn’t affect your other statutory rights as a consumer. Nor as a monster.

We try to use the same method to pay you as you used to pay us.