This page has been automatically translated for humans

Cubed Earwax

Our earwax is harvested from humans fed on a strict diet of Tinned Fear, which is marvellously effective in stimulating the Ceruminous Gland.Made the traditional way, in copper pans above a gas flame, this is some of the finest earwax available anywhere.

£6.50

Free UK delivery on orders over £50 - Delivery and returns information

All profits go to the Ministry of Stories, a creative writing charity for humans

Notes for Humans:

Delicious Clotted Cream Fudge in Individually Wrapped Bites (150g)

Ingredients: Sugar, Glucose syrup, Sweetened Condensed Milk (Milk, Sugar), Palm Oil, Clotted cream 4% (Milk), Butter (Milk, Salt), Emulsifier: Soya Lecithin, Humectant; Glycerine, Salt.

‘Loved the bars of blended earwax but was thrilled to discover it also comes in single-source cubes. We made a party game of trying to identify the diets consumed during individual cubes’ production.’

-Joe and Russ, Invisible Men

Free UK delivery on all orders over £50