We have all dragged ourselves out of the crypt when the alarm on the phone can no longer be ignored, only to find ourselves gazing gloomily at our dusty collection of rags. When we look at the brightly dressed humans tottering cheerfully out of the pub at what for us is the start of a working night, we can feel utterly out of touch.
We who have reflections don’t find looking in a mirror always a comfort either. Just because you are dead – or a bat – or invisible – doesn’t mean that you don’t want to look good!
But how? Well..
Don't try to follow a trend slavishly. Let’s face it, not all of us have the fashion sense of vampires. The rest of us have to think a little harder. Some looks just don’t suit everyone - lace inserts work on a werewolf, but do nothing for a troll.
The trick is to work the look you already have.
Black can be lifted by jewellery. Don't shy away from shopping the present trend of Goth chic. You can substitute real skulls to add a sense of surprise. Or try a simple but elegant drape of snot around your shoulders.
Ragged or torn clothes need no adjustment; they are always effortlessly stylish.
Tattoos can be a fun way of attaining visibility when you want to be seen.
Blood spatters on an otherwise plain garment add colour when you need to make a splash.
Make a feature of your problem areas: bolts in the neck? Give them a dusting of glitter.
And don’t forget cosmetics: the range of After Death Colours (available at Hoxton Monster Supplies online) can add definition and sparkle to bone. (Note: Don’t attempt eye make-up if you are a Gorgon. Looking in a mirror can ruin the effect.)
Above all, remember: you’re worth it!