This page has been automatically translated for humans
NEW!

Salt Made from Tears of Home Schooling

This distinctive salt is made from tears shed while home schooling. With a delicious celery flavour, it’s quite perfect in a Bloody Mary.

Salt made from Tears combines centuries-old craft with the freshest human tears which are gently boiled, released into shallow crystallisation tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine.

Developed in collaboration with expert tear harvesters Halen Mon.

DISGRUNTLED NOTICE: Please note we've been mobbed by monsters of all kinds since releasing this unique new salt. Any orders placed after 9am on Friday 26 February will be dispatched within 7 days as we await our next delivery. Can't wait that long? Why not sample our new Salt Made from Tears of Hope.

 

£9

Free UK delivery on orders over £65 - Delivery and returns information

All profits go to the Ministry of Stories, a creative writing charity for humans

Notes for Humans:

Superior coarse sea salt with celery, from expert salt harvesters Halen Môn.

Ingredients

Sea salt and celery (Contains Celery 20%)

Weight

80g

‘I shared this secret ingredient with little Monster Chef Class today. They chewed their claws and paws in agony while I explained human Home Schooling. I threatened to send them home if they are anything but raucous and disobedient, with great results.’

-Cornelius Comnenos, Headmaster, Monster School of Mixology & Potions

Other monsters also bought

Free UK delivery on all orders over £65