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Salt Made from Tears of Boredom

This rare salt is made from tears of utter boredom, shed just at the point of outright hopelessness. These are collected only on wet Tuesday afternoons in February. Oddly the salt renders any dish instantly fascinating.

Combines centuries-old craft with the freshest human tears which are gently boiled, released into shallow crystallisation tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine.

Developed in collaboration with expert tear harvesters Halen M̫on.


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All profits go to the Ministry of Stories, a creative writing charity for humans

Notes for Humans:

Superior coarse sea salt with Welsh charcoal, from expert salt harvesters Halen Mon.


Sea salt and charcoal (Contains charcoal 5%)



‘If ever there was a ho-hum condiment, THIS is it. A faultless C+. At the same time looks absolutely striking on flesh. Will definitely recommend. If I can be bothered.’

-Adrienne, an American Werewolf in London

Free UK delivery on all orders over £50